Metal As Fukk Interview: James Snyder

James Snyder is an LA actor who’s appeared in “She’s The Man” with Amanda Bynes, “Meth Head” with Tom Sizemore, “The GingerDead Man” with Gary Busey and the Broadway musical “Cry-Baby” as Cry-Baby Walker. He usually plays a charming pretty boy, but when the film runs out and the curtain drops, he’ll rip your fukkin’ heart out through your mouth.

Metal As Fukk: Who was more difficult to work with- the homicidal cookie in “The GingerDead Man”, or twin teen heartthrobs Zack and Cody in “The Suite Life With Zack and Cody”?

James Snyder: Gary Busey (the voice of the cookie) was nuts to work with.  He’d stop the whole production to tell a Hitler joke or yell at me because he thought I was hitting on an actress on set that he’d been hitting on. When he kills me in the movie, he stabs me with a switch blade and I struggle a bit and he yelled at me to stop moving because, unbeknownst to me, he stabbed me in the spine.

MAFkk: “Amanda Bynes vs. Tanya Harding: Two Girls, One Pipe- Battle To The Death”- Who walks out alive?

JS: Amanda is actually really sweet. If she can use her varying mental states as a weapon she may stand a chance. But shit, have you seen Tanya lately? Wouldn’t want to run into her in a mosh pit.

MAFkk: What’s the most Metal As Fukk Broadway Showtune?

JS: “The Circle Of Life.” (From The Lion King)

MAFkk: Do you question your heterosexuality after coming up with the last answer so quickly?

JS: Every day. In musical theater, you’re gay until proven straight. Sometimes as I am singing and dancing, I have that moment of panic. Then I realize I’m surrounded by hot female dancers, and everything is okay.

MAFkk: Marry/Fukk/Kill: Chewbacca/Han Solo/Boba Fett?

JS: No brainer. Chewie is the marrying type; loyal, cuddly, can fly a Corellian YT-1300 Freighter.  Han Solo has got to be a tender lover. Kill Boba and take his rocket pack for a ride.

MAFkk: If you were going to play a serial killer in a TV movie, who would you play?

JS: Dahmer.  But I would give it a cooking show spin, sort of like “Julie and Julia” but with human meat.

MAFkk: Setting the DVR right now. Set the mere mortals straight: The Three Little Pigs, Metal As Fukk or Not Metal As Fukk?

JS: Metal As Fukk.

MAFkk: A Threesome between Miss Piggy, Kermit & The Swedish Chef?

JS: Green, slimy, smells like pork?  Metal As Fukk.

MAFkk: Molars?

JS: Not Metal As Fukk.

MAFkk: Bicuspids?

JS: Bi?  I guess if they’re female, Metal As Fukk.

MAFkk: Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru?

JS: They are both only Metal as Fukk if they show up to a BBQ.

MAFkk: Too soon! Glaciers?

JS: Not Metal As Fukk! Quit letting global warming kick your ass!

MAFkk: Haiti?

JS: Metal As Fukk.

MAFkk: Agreed. Tom Sizemore?

JS:  Fukk dude, the guy told me a story about him seeing Lindsay Lohan doing meth in her teenage years.

MAFkk: While he was in his forties…

JS: That fukker has lived hard.  Metal As Fukk.

MAFkk:  When A Model Train Derails in Europe?

JS: Not Metal As Fukk.

MAFkk: When Train Full of European Models Derails And Everyone Dies?

JS: Waste of hotness.  Metal As Fukk.

MAFkk: General Tso?

JS: The dude was Chinese Rebel AND a food… Metal As Fukk.

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