Metal As Fukk Honeymoon Spots

Yeah, the wedding was great and all. But you don’t really knows if she’s the one until you see her take a machete to a Congolese child soldier…

Newlyweds can breathe new life into the city’s famous brothels. Even through all the ash, you can still smell the hepatitis.

Nothing’s more romantic than a little two-on-two bball with The Worm and a pudgy 4-foot-tall dictator. Fine, you gayboys can be skins.!/img/httpImage/image.jpg_gen/derivatives/landscape_635/rodmanwire2n-4-web.jpg

South Sudan
Couples in need of a post-nuptial detox can try the two-week ethnic cleanse. By day two you’ll want to kill yourself. By day six you’ll forget you ever lived with concentrated carbs – or Dinkas.

Home of the classic “Pirates of the Horn of Africa” flume ride. It’s just like Disneyland’s version, but this time the whole “rape and pillage” part is a little more in-your-face. Drink up, me hearties yo ho!

Catch some killer waves with the entire beach to yourself! And that tail will really come in handy when you’re grinding a gnarly barrel, brah.

Don’t let all the Al Qaeda flags and dead Americans in the street fool you, it’s a really tourist-friendly town. Now don’t be shy!

Sure, this tiny country is home to two of the top five “Murder Capitals of the World.” But before you’re decapitated and tossed into a mass grave, you’ll take in one of the most beautriful sunsets on earth.

You’ll never believe the dirt-cheap rent on this downtown villa – complete with Its own private pool! And very friendly neighbors.

Old Yugoslavia
Plan a drug-fueled fukkfest in one of the country’s many abandoned Soviet monuments. It’s like a sexy shrine to genocide and political corruption.

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